Just a Little Strained
by alikat522
Summary: Simon and Caitlin Crieff do care about their little brother, but he doesn't often want their help.


**Simon**

"Martin, what happened?"

"Simon, what are you doing here, it's an hour drive? And who called you?"

"I'm still your emergency contact, remember?"

"I don't need one, I'm fine. It's just a little strain, nothing to worry about."

"Nah, you're going to be on painkillers. You can't drive, you can't fly, and I'm not going to let you spend the night in that little attic of yours. Cait's visiting once she gets off work, she and I can help move your stuff, and you're staying with me for a while."

"Oh, and I have absolutely no say in this matter?"

"Nope, none whatsoever."

"Simon, you can't just barge in here and tell me I'm staying with you! I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself."

"Uh huh, tell that to your neck brace."

"It's just a strain."

"It's called whiplash. They said you got into a crash?"

"Oh, yes. Well, no, not really. I was just finishing up making a delivery, and the breaks have a minor, very small fault, and I came to a more sudden stop than I would have preferred. I didn't actually hit anything."

"Your breaks don't work?"

"It's not exactly that they don't work, it's that-"

"Martin. Your breaks don't work?"

"Not as such, no."

"…You know what this means, don't you?"

"Simon, don't."

"Martin, shut up, I am getting you a new van. One that isn't going to kill you."

"Simon, I am telling you, I do not need your help. My van is fine, it just needs some repairs."

"The van has needed repairs since I was a kid, now it's a rusty deathtrap. I am getting you a new van, I am parking it outside your apartment, and I am taking the old one and selling it for scrap."

"I won't let you!"

"Pfff. Martin, I've been hotwiring that van since I was fifteen, what makes you think you can keep me out of it?"

"Yes, and you taught me to hotwire, so I'll just steal it back!"

"Or you could pull your broken head out of your arse and accept a gift."

"It's not a gift, it is pity. Which I don't need."

"If I don't get you a birthday present, will you take it?"

"Simon, you don't give birthday presents as pricy as new vans."

"I would if you'd let me! Okay, early birthday and Christmas present from me, Caitlin and Mum. We won't get you anything for the rest of the year."

"Ah, yes, because knowing I'd be taking money from the old woman and the single mother makes it so much more dignified."

"You don't have the fancy hat on now; you can shove dignity and take a gift like a fucking man instead of quibbling about it. Understood?"

"…How is it that you managed to get Dad's tone down? I couldn't get my voice that low if I tried."

"At least you were spared the joy of being the primary school baritone. So you'll take the van?"

"…I'll think about it. But I can stay in my apartment tonight; I just need a ride home."

"And promise me that you'll take a break long enough to heal. Tell that 'boss' of yours that you may spend all your free time catering to her needs, but you're not wagering your health on it."

"…"

"Martin?"

"I'll think about it."

-/-

-/-

**Caitlin**

"Oh my God, look at you, Martin. You look like death warmed over."

"It's just a neck brace. Where are the girls?"

"Just a neck brace, yeah. And did the car crash steal a stone and a half from you too?"

"I'm fine, Caitlin, you can stop fussing."

"No, I can't, but I'll pause. Lila and Maggie are with my friend Susan, she was able to pick them up from daycare. Sorry it took me so long to get here; the bartender on the next shift was late."

"It's not a problem. You don't need to be here at all."

"Did you already manage to chase Simon away? I thought he got here before me."

"He's getting something in the cafeteria, he'll be back in a few minutes."

"And you didn't try to sneak out. Good for you."

"He paid one of the nurses to make sure I didn't leave. If you look through the little window, you can see her watching me."

"I _thought_ that woman looked creepy."

"But I've already told Simon, I'm not staying with him."

"Of course you're not."

"Yes, see, you understand!"

"Yeah, because you're staying with me and the girls. The sofa pulls out, but if it's too hard on your neck, I can move Maggie's crib into my room and Lila can sleep on a camp bed."

"Caitlin! I'm not going to steal a six-year-old's bed! And I am fine in my own apartment, I've been fine there all this time and I'm still fine now!"

"Better quiet down, or Scary Nurse is gonna come in."

"Caitlin, please try to understand that I simply do not need your hand-outs right now. If I stay with you, you are going to spend the week trying to shove food and clothes off on me, despite the fact that I am doing quite well on my own."

"I'd say take a look at the neck brace, but I don't think you are supposed to bend that way. Okay, you want to play this game, fine. Martin, my dearest brother, I need a week's worth of free daycare. Can you give me that?"

"…Oh, that is just low, even for you."

"But it's working. My darling brother, my daughters need a strong male role model in their lives; who better than a pilot, a captain even, to guide them through this crucial stage in their developments?"

"I really hate when you do this, you know."

"I understand that you would find it beneath your dignity to accept my money, but please allow me to show my appreciation through the offering of the humble food of my home. You can cook it and serve it to the girls while regaling them with tales of your travels around the world. If there just happens to be plenty left over, it would downright wasteful for you to not have some as well."

"Fine, fine, just…just stop it, alright. I'll, I'll babysit for you. Just while I have some time on my hands."

"Good to know."

-/-

-/-

**Lila**

"So if you take off that thing, will your head fall off?"

"No, I assure you my head is still attached. Could you pass me Maggie's bottle?"

"Here. So you're really a pilot? You fly planes?"

"I am a _captain_. That means that not only am I a pilot, but I am the head pilot, in charge of all the other pilots."

"You're like the king pilot?"

"Well, not real-…yes, yes I suppose you could put it like that. Being a captain is sort of like being a king pilot."

"Wow."

"And I get to travel all over the world in my jet plane. Just last week I was in Tokyo, all the way in Japan."

"What's in Japan?"

"A person who wanted us to bring a package to him. We took the box and we flew to Japan, then we gave them the box, rested for twelve hours, then took another box from someone else and brought it back to Fitton."

"Why Fitton?"

"Because landing fees are cheaper in Fitton than anywhere else in Britain, and MJN is cheaper than Air England, which means that the client can contribute more of their budget towards their product as opposed to the transport."

"…Huh?"

"I'll explain when you get older. But you need to start getting ready for bed, miss. Go get your pajamas on and brush your teeth, then I'll come in with your story."

"Ooh, ooh, I want to hear that one from last time!"

"Which was that?"

"The train one, with the little good train and the big bad trains and all the clown toys!"

"The Little Engine That Could?"

"Yeah! And you have to do the voices! Give the lazy trains the really low voice, and make the good train really squeaky!"

"I think I'll be able to manage. But only if you get ready for bed first."

"Aye aye, Captain Uncle Martin!"

"Um, Lila, that's the wrong kind of captain, you see-…aye aye, First Officer Lila."

-/-

-/-

**Douglas **

"So, enjoy your week in the lap of recuperative luxury?"

"Uh…it was alright, I suppose. Managed to tolerate my brother and sister, so that's always a sure sign of a victory."

"Well, good to have you back on board, Captain."

"Aye aye."

"Pardon?"

"Oh, I-I'm glad to be back."


End file.
